How giving brings

There are times when you feel like you give too much, whether it is to your family, friends or random acquaintances that happened to meet your way. In most cases when you start giving advices, money, material goods or even time, people tend to ask for more and some will, as much as they can. When you stop for whatever reason (the person is not following your advices; you want to focus more on yourself or you’ve noticed no matter how much you can give the only way someone could get out of trouble is their own determination) two things usually happen:

#1 They realize something has changed and they start loosing interest in you. If they feel they can’t drain anything from you anymore, they usually disappear, and will look for someone else to support them in their endless misery. Often, people just don’t see how much they trap themselves into their gloom and think they constantly need someone to be there to watch them dig deeper. Ephemeral bliss, short moments when they forget about being miserable are the only positive impacts your giving would bring.

#2 Some other people when they notice you’re giving less than you usually do will take time to understand why you’ve stopped and will start giving in return. This is usually how long term relationships start. Once both individuals know they don’t need to watch how much they are giving because they know it will return in anyway, sooner or later, giving then becomes natural.

One of the two points seems negative compared with the other. Who would like to waste time or more giving for nothing? Well, when you really think about it, it is NOT nothing. Even if you don’t see the return of your support, you will always feel better giving for nothing than not giving at all.

Image by Uckhet

#1 It brings a terrible feeling not to have paid enough attention to the people around you when you know later that you could have taken some time to show you care. What most people don’t realize is that we don’t often have second chances. Even when we do, they might not be as thrilling as the first try.

#2 Knowing you could have done something that would have entirely turned a situation is a feeling far more devastating than what you feel when you give with no return. You won’t necessarily know how important your support is for another person, and people are often too arrogant to let it out. However, when it happens, you also get your part of happiness.

#3 Finally, if you think there’s just nothing you could ever give to get someone out of their misery, look again. Just being there sometimes helps. Once again, you might not be aware of your impact, but if they keep coming to you, you are probably helping already more than you think.

5 tips on how to be better prepared in case of an Internet Breakdown

We still don’t have access to Internet but I am writing this now while I can fully experience the situation. God, how disconnected from the world I can feel right now. I was reduced to look for a gardener on the Yellow pages, thing I haven’t done for too long now. When you are hooked, it is really, really hard to live without it: You are not going to the movies, because you don’t know how to check the timetables, you don’t order food because you don’t see the menu in the phone book, you can’t check websites when you see something interesting on TV, and you are forced to open a dictionary when you don’t know how to spell a word, when all you had to do before was to open your iGoogle page, and I haven’t started talking about communicating with your friends and family yet… which is one of the first reasons why people would get an internet connection. So here is a 5 tips to survive without internet for a week, read it now, before it’s too late.

#1 Keep the yellow pages

When we received the phone books I almost laughed and said: “Who on earth would actually open one of these big books to look for a restaurant or a shop! They should just minimize the use of paper and stop printing stuff out.” There are three books and they are HUGE!

Well as I wrote earlier, having them around will help. I don’t know how I would have found a gardener today if we didn’t have them and seriously, it wasn’t that hard.

#2 Have a dictionary around

Who would have thought a good old dictionary could still be useful. Today a friend of mine came home and while he was sending a text message he asked me how to spell the word “cutlery”. I really thought it uses two “t” but his phone’s T9 didn’t recognize the word. No Internet, we had to open the dictionary that was sleeping on the lounge table.

#3 Keep restaurants menus and try not to lose them.

When you go out for lunch or dinner, check if the restaurant does take away and ask for a copy of their menu. The most difficult part after that is to keep the menu at a place you will remember when you will need it. The best way I believe is to give it to the most organized person in the house, or have it stuck on a board or on the door of your fridge. There‘s nothing more frustrating than looking for something you know you have but can’t put a hand on.

#4 Watch the news

I have on my Igoogle page gadgets which updates every time something happens on the news, local and international. I usually have a quick look at the headlines and open anything that catches my interests. When you’re not connected, well, you have to watch the news.

#5 Tell people around you

When you are connected all the time and actually replying to your emails, make sure the people around you know you don’t have internet for a while. They will start worrying if you are generally connected on messenger services, updating your facebook status, posting new articles on your blog, and keeping up with forums you’re regularly writing on.

Remember how long you have lived without internet and don’t worry too much, it is only for a short period of time. See it as a way of getting prepared in case you have to stay longer without it. Use this time to visit your friends, improve your social skills and accomplish the things you usually put on hold because of the distraction Internet causes. It’s funny I am writing this, but I can’t wait…

PS: I still don’t have the net, just managed to check my mail and post this from school